Unbounded - 1.17,31.10

These are the lyrics of a song I just finished writing today:

Your irrevocable grace
Your merciful design
To make a love covenant with me!
For my unfaithfulness
You'd take the death penalty.

Unbounded tension and relief:
An undeserved way out for me,
And the undeserved suffering of my Ever-Faithful God.

This is more than anyone else would offer me
Far beyond what any false god would give
The angels marvel and the universe sings
Of Your passion unmeasureable for me.

Unbounded holiness and joy
You are the Lover of my soul
I long for You, and I will not rest until I see Your face.

What profound a peace is this:
It is finished; I am free!
The Earth trembles from its deepest hidden places...
My resurrected Jesus is my Solid Rock and Rest.

Unbounded power over all
You send Truth out to bring me in
There's no place in all the world
Where I cannot see Your dance of love for me.

Morning Psalm

When sunlight breaks over the mountains,
And depth of vision appears;
When the morning warms my hands and face,
And the full breath of life fills my body and soul -
I praise you for your goodness,
And I praise you for your unfailing love!
New grace, New mercies,
New fulfillment of your perfect purposes...
GREAT is your faithfulness!
How wide! How deep! How infinite, eternal, and unchangeable!
GREAT is your faithfulness, my Beautiful God!

Don't be murky. Don't be clear... But clarify yourself.

Unthinkably intentional.
Why would you do this?
I don't know what to think of what you are.
Confusingly BEing.
What is your motive?
You are not who I thought you were.
Chronically different?
Please be unchangeable...
I think...
Eternal?
You are confusing me.
Be one.
Stay there.
Hear me.
Speak true.
Sing beauty.

I need to see solid in your eyes.
I need to see authentic.
Trustworthy.
I need to feel care in your touch.
I need to feel it.
I need to feel?

Speak reality to me.
I have to know.
I have to know, or I die.
Show yourself to be all that you say you are.
Show yourself.
Be true.
Be Truth.

Polar.

Cold confusion
A dark night with
Flowing colors and
Beautiful creatures
Enchanting territory
It’s frightening
The opposite pole is far away
The magnetism tugs at my soul and my body
And in this dim polar region
A voice of the air calls me to dwell
With a motive to capture and enslave me
To cause me pain and death in the icy exposure and
To cause me to fall through a façade of
Solidly frozen waters
To be swept into the ghostly jaws of
The whore and the priest
Who have drowned in this dark polar sea.

Burning Away the Mask - 6.15.09

Blazing Sun
Burns away my mask,
Revealing a fearful soul so small;
I am tired and scarred.

I smell the Presence,
The fragrance of healing.
My hands reach out for
Invisible Reality,
As a Music -
Not in my ears but in my spirit -
Calls me passionately
To a life worth living.

Truth - 6.12.09

Vibrantly ethereal
Truth.
So clear So exact So precise
Slicing through "impenetrable" darkness
Like a light of diamond.
Rays of color, rays of light -
We cannot touch it,
But it touches us gently.
The dark cannot touch it,
But Light crushes Dark with
Infinite force.

Inside - 4.20.09

Look inside and
Find nothing
But something
That is
Both inside and outside, and-
So much bigger, greater, immense-
She is Unfathomable
He is Unquenchable
Ah, Indescribable!

My Current State - 4.20.09

Process of protection
Enigmatic fact
Time and speech are no solace.

Where is rest?
I cannot find it.

ouch. ouch. ouch.

A scream is all I have to say.
I am too exhausted and broken in every way,
and cannot put more into words than this.

Prayer 3.21.09

Father God,
The darkness is engulfing me!
The darkness is crashing over me like a great wave.
The Spirit cries out within me,
But the fragrance of truth seems overwhelming.
So I want to reject it
And inside me is a battle between life and death.
Why is it that goodness sometimes seems too much to bear?
I do not see eternity; I do not see clearly.
I do not see that this is so much bigger -
There is so much more.

If I could describe a raindrop
Or if I could describe the depths of the night sky...
But I am small.
I am so limited in every way
Except...
In relationship with You.
You have set no limit there.
Only I set limits
Because my blindness causes me to fear.
I falter to trust, I tremble, I fall, I faint.
Save me, my God, the Life!
MY Life, Bring me into the light –
Let me see your light –
Even if I cannot see it and live.

I want to see you
I want to know you
I want to be with you,
I want to be with you all the time.
Every day of life that you've given me, I have hurt you.
But I know you love me still
Even though I do not understand why.
So bring me to you,
Bring me to you!
Make me holy
So I can be with you, God!